I started my first book on men today

One of the first books that I read in starting this blog had been Jesus Feminist, which is the style of feminist I then proclaimed to be. As research grew and this little time has passed, I let the title of feminist fade in favor of egalitarian and Jesus unintentionally slipped on with it. I apologize for that.

I started Wild At Heart today. It was what was recommended to me when I realized that I should expand my reading to other genders. This should have been obvious from the beginning, but it wasn’t. I started it today and I already find it mildly irritating. I imagine that men may likely feel the same way when reading The Second Sex, The Feminine Mystique, and possibly Jesus Feminist. I’ll finish it, but so far I find the gendering a little too extensive. When he mentions the masculine and feminine hearts, I feel like the author is describing all people both times. But it may be better explained later, so I’ll hold my criticism.

My other irritation came just before I went to church this morning, and struck a cord with me and the sermon today. In the first chapter of Wild At Heart, the author mentions that it is now proclaimed at church that men of God should aim to be Nice Guys. I know we’ve seen a lot about the Nice Guy Syndrome in the news lately, but that’s not exactly what he was referring to, as this book predates the news that has popularized this concept. He’s talking about traditional Nice Guy idea that men of God should just be as nice to everyone as possible and not swear and blah blah blah. Then I went to church and was reminded of this verse from Matthew 25:

34“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

This sounds pretty specific about the nice things that God wants people to do for each other. I know that there are many more verses on many more aspects of men and manly things, but I thought this was an interesting message to hear on the same morning when I read that first chapter saying men are asked to just be nice guys at church. But again, perhaps I’ll find the answers in further chapters.

Join me again here this Friday for thoughts on misandry and Twitter @createparity for news on gender issues!

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2 thoughts on “I started my first book on men today

  1. I wouldn’t have recommenced that, at least not as a first read. Seeing something from a different perspective is very challenging. Dr. Warren Farrel’s books would have been a much better place to start. The Myth of Male power and Why Men Make More are both very good places to start to better understand men. Dr. Warren Farrel was the chairperson for two terms on the NY Board for the National Organization For Women (NOW). He is well versed in feminism and women’s perspective. As such he does a great job of explaining issues that men face in ways that are understandable and accessible to women.

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